Also the mania bit. From first hearing it, it sounds as if there’s something mentally wrong with us, which may be the case with the brain and chemicals and all, but the sound of mania, it’s just got connotations of being crazy, insane, you know. All the bad stuff, nothing sounds good or nice about it.

Plus it’s just so long, and nothing relates to the actual disorder. It just screams explanation if we ever say it to someone, and that’s just a bit long to explain it. I’d rather just say google it.

I had a long comment typed up, but then I looked down and comment luv had messed up, and it said “click here for info” and then I did, and it went right to your front page and killed my comment. So I will try typing it all up again.

I’ve always thought that it is said like TRICK-Till-OH-MAY-NEE-uh. But On closer inspection there is that first O….So, uhh… TRY-KOH-TILL-OH-MAY-NEE-UH? That is a lot of syllables. But either way, I don’t think it’s a very difficult word. You just look at each consonant and vowel sound and put it together. But then, I am an English buff…

I have had Trichotillomania since the 3rd grade. I just started pulling the hairs on my head one day when I was alone on the bus. Eventually I got a bald spot from it, and other kids noticed. I was so embarassed that I started doing it in other, more hidden places- my armpits, my arms, my legs, my knees, my groin area, etc.

For me, the pulling was a combination of different factors. I think it was the compulsion, my depression, and my own body dysmorphism. I have always had problems with my body, whether it is my race, my hair, my weight, my gender, and (i’ll admit it) my size. I have also had chronic eczema my whole life, and so when I scratched, the pulling was a natural extension of the stress building and then release. I remember having sessions of pulling, when I would sit on the toilet and just pull and pull compulsively.

I don’t really know how it happened, but eventually the Trich just tapered off over time. I just stopped feeling the need to pull, although it does happen every once in a blue moon, but on a smaller scale. I believe strongly that a lot of it had to do with how I felt about my body. I had this strong compulsion that I had to be “clean”, that I just couldn’t have any hairs on my body. This was especially true for my armpits and down there.

I am not quite sure what I wanted to say with this. But you are definitely not alone!
.-= Chungyen Chang´s last blog ..in-betweeners =-.